A Month of Cleansing #4 (Second Dream)
Rolling Stones, "Miss You"...odd choice for 8 am on a rainy saturday, but i saw it on my playlist and thought, "I think i'd like to listen to that song." I have it on random and i shuffle through waiting for a good song to listen to. This one stuck out, apparently.
Maybe i am a bit more honest here than most people would think your average blogger should be. But i'm not your average blogger now am i? In fact, i'm not your average person. Statistically speaking, i don't exist. But that's for another time. I had another dream last night, this time about working at the stork club.
First, a dream from a few nights ago...
Emma was on the carpet and i was yelling at her for something. It was one of those quick, "HEY, CUT THAT OUT!" things. Well, as i was, a state worker came in and got mad because our club had gotten written up for the employees yelling at the kids. So, she pulled me upstairs and gave me a good-sized scolding lecture about how i should talk to the kids, and why i shouldn't yell. Sasha was in the kitchen, where the state woman brought me, and she was crying because she had gotten in trouble for the same thing (which is odd, because she works with the infants). I don't remember much else.
And now, our feature presentation:
I dreamed that Sue, Stephen's mom, came in and got mad at me because i placed him near Michael during naptime. Michael's a loud kid, so she blamed him (and me) for Stephen not being able to sleep. She actually started to get really loud and frustrated, and since i didn't want a scene, i looked at her from across the room (yes, she was getting frustrated on the other side of the room) and i motioned for her to quiet down a little. I did that thing where my eyes get a little wider (not in an angry way), and i move my hand down to signify getting quieter. She was respectful of that, and came over to talk to me. I explained to her that we have a lot of loud kids at naptime, and if i put them all together, it would be really hard to get them to quiet down, so i separate them. So, no matter where i put Stephen, he's going to be near a loud kid. I was very calm during my explanation.
Nothing in the dream surprised me, except for one thing. I actually stood up to her (again, not in an angry way), and said what i felt was right. I don't usually do that. I tend to shy away from those situations at work because i'm afraid the parent will get mad or whatever. It was pretty nice to stand my ground. I've been trying to get myself to do that. Even if i end up being wrong, i need to commit to what i feel is the right thing, and stand my ground. I mean, i have to be open to what others have to say, but if i truly feel that what i'm doing/saying needs to be stood for, then i need to do that. For instance, when parents come i tend to back down from telling the kids they can't do things that normally i wouldn't let them do. I have to stop. If a parent doesn't like the way i work, or the way i discipline, that's not really my problem. I'm certainly open to suggestion, but if i feel something needs to be done, then i need to do it whether they like it or not.
Well, that's what i learned from last night's dream. I'm getting better at standing my ground, and i need to continue improving in that area. I've been so uncommitted that i don't know what i stand for anymore. I certainly hope i can strengthen that part of me...reinforce the walls.
Coldplay, "Trouble"
Maybe i am a bit more honest here than most people would think your average blogger should be. But i'm not your average blogger now am i? In fact, i'm not your average person. Statistically speaking, i don't exist. But that's for another time. I had another dream last night, this time about working at the stork club.
First, a dream from a few nights ago...
Emma was on the carpet and i was yelling at her for something. It was one of those quick, "HEY, CUT THAT OUT!" things. Well, as i was, a state worker came in and got mad because our club had gotten written up for the employees yelling at the kids. So, she pulled me upstairs and gave me a good-sized scolding lecture about how i should talk to the kids, and why i shouldn't yell. Sasha was in the kitchen, where the state woman brought me, and she was crying because she had gotten in trouble for the same thing (which is odd, because she works with the infants). I don't remember much else.
And now, our feature presentation:
I dreamed that Sue, Stephen's mom, came in and got mad at me because i placed him near Michael during naptime. Michael's a loud kid, so she blamed him (and me) for Stephen not being able to sleep. She actually started to get really loud and frustrated, and since i didn't want a scene, i looked at her from across the room (yes, she was getting frustrated on the other side of the room) and i motioned for her to quiet down a little. I did that thing where my eyes get a little wider (not in an angry way), and i move my hand down to signify getting quieter. She was respectful of that, and came over to talk to me. I explained to her that we have a lot of loud kids at naptime, and if i put them all together, it would be really hard to get them to quiet down, so i separate them. So, no matter where i put Stephen, he's going to be near a loud kid. I was very calm during my explanation.
Nothing in the dream surprised me, except for one thing. I actually stood up to her (again, not in an angry way), and said what i felt was right. I don't usually do that. I tend to shy away from those situations at work because i'm afraid the parent will get mad or whatever. It was pretty nice to stand my ground. I've been trying to get myself to do that. Even if i end up being wrong, i need to commit to what i feel is the right thing, and stand my ground. I mean, i have to be open to what others have to say, but if i truly feel that what i'm doing/saying needs to be stood for, then i need to do that. For instance, when parents come i tend to back down from telling the kids they can't do things that normally i wouldn't let them do. I have to stop. If a parent doesn't like the way i work, or the way i discipline, that's not really my problem. I'm certainly open to suggestion, but if i feel something needs to be done, then i need to do it whether they like it or not.
Well, that's what i learned from last night's dream. I'm getting better at standing my ground, and i need to continue improving in that area. I've been so uncommitted that i don't know what i stand for anymore. I certainly hope i can strengthen that part of me...reinforce the walls.
Coldplay, "Trouble"
posted by Still Daddy at 7:04 AM
1 Comments:
Good point. I always have trouble standing up for myself and staying true to what I believe in, stuff like that. I guess I'm just not all that strong. But whatever. Nice blog...
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