Gotta Have Those Bolts
Why would you want to grease lightning anyway? It's fast enough as it is i doubt grease would slick it any faster. And how would you apply grease to it in the first place? You'd probably...no, you would be electrocuted. 1.21 jigowatts. Not worth it.
Adam, it's just a phrase made famous by a popular "classic" 70's film. No one's actually going to grease a bolt of lightning. It's impossible.
Yeah. I know.
Anyway...
Last night was defined by a lightning storm, the likes of which i have never seen before. I don't think there was much rain because i couldn't hear any. Thunder, while it was certainly rumbling, wasn't as big of a presence as i would have expected it to be given the amount of lightning.
As i said to Alyssa during the storm (don't worry, kids, it was via AIM on my laptop, running on battery power to keep me disconnected from any electrical conductors), it's difficult for me to relate the visuals of the storm with words. This is how i tried:
It was like the paparazzi.
It was like a strobe light.
It was like D-Day.
It was like War of the Worlds.
There was a bowling party in Heaven and they were using all the lanes.
That's about the closest i can get with known references. there had to be, easily, 60 bolts of lightning per minute. That's 360 per hour. My windows were taking rolls and rolls of photographs of my room. There was constant static discharge between the sky and the ground.
It wasn't a concentrated storm either where all the lightning is over that way or out back. No. This lightning was all over; from every direction. Near, far, right here, way out there. Everywhere. Sometimes it woudl just be a flash and other times i could actually see the bolt. White, pink, orange.
FLASH...FLASH FLASH...FLASH.......FLASH FLASH FLASH....
Perhaps Zeus had a surplus of bolts and wanted to get rid of the excess. It's the end of the fiscal year on Mt. Olympus and in order to receive the same number of bolts in next year's budget, he must use all the previous year's up. I can't say as i blame him.
Gotta have those bolts.
Adam, it's just a phrase made famous by a popular "classic" 70's film. No one's actually going to grease a bolt of lightning. It's impossible.
Yeah. I know.
Anyway...
Last night was defined by a lightning storm, the likes of which i have never seen before. I don't think there was much rain because i couldn't hear any. Thunder, while it was certainly rumbling, wasn't as big of a presence as i would have expected it to be given the amount of lightning.
As i said to Alyssa during the storm (don't worry, kids, it was via AIM on my laptop, running on battery power to keep me disconnected from any electrical conductors), it's difficult for me to relate the visuals of the storm with words. This is how i tried:
It was like the paparazzi.
It was like a strobe light.
It was like D-Day.
It was like War of the Worlds.
There was a bowling party in Heaven and they were using all the lanes.
That's about the closest i can get with known references. there had to be, easily, 60 bolts of lightning per minute. That's 360 per hour. My windows were taking rolls and rolls of photographs of my room. There was constant static discharge between the sky and the ground.
It wasn't a concentrated storm either where all the lightning is over that way or out back. No. This lightning was all over; from every direction. Near, far, right here, way out there. Everywhere. Sometimes it woudl just be a flash and other times i could actually see the bolt. White, pink, orange.
FLASH...FLASH FLASH...FLASH.......FLASH FLASH FLASH....
Perhaps Zeus had a surplus of bolts and wanted to get rid of the excess. It's the end of the fiscal year on Mt. Olympus and in order to receive the same number of bolts in next year's budget, he must use all the previous year's up. I can't say as i blame him.
Gotta have those bolts.
posted by Still Daddy at 2:58 PM
2 Comments:
I understand the War of the Worlds reference now, though I have yet to finish watching it.
Well this car is automatic, it's systematic, it's hydromatic
Why it's greased lightnin'!
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